Okay, here's the deal: I, like most Harry Potter fans, will readily admit that Chamber of Secrets is my least favorite Potter. But what does that even mean? I'm not sure, but I will defend my five star rating of this book, and ALL the other Potter books, until the day I die. If you're reading Harry Potter and thinking, oh, gee, all of this list making sure is distracting, or, hey, this character seems pointless, or, why does Rowling use so many adverbs -- I am so superior to her! Then guess what? You are an asshole*, and you're missing the point. How dare you. Because guess what again? These aren't books. These aren't stories. ALL OF THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Ratings don't apply. It is so obvious.
NOW who's the asshole?
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*If, for some reason, you are offended by this review, you need to do one of two things: a) Go look up the definition of 'hyperbole' in the dictionary, or b) Quit being an asshole.